I am writing this post remote from Happy Donuts, its last day, last 9 hours.
1. This is admittedly a weird place to start even a lyrical essay about the rise and fall of Palo Alto’s Happy Donuts, but I am sitting in Printer’s Cafe, the day after the Last Donut Show — in fact I ran into Barry Harris, who shot the artwork below, looking up at the giant donut fixture, who was here, with his dog, working with the “problem solver group” or “puzzle meet-up”, and I was trying, after days of procrastinating, to figure out how to use the Canon PowerShot A590 digital camera that I was gifted in 2009, used for a while then abandoned. I have been hunched over the two devices, my Mac and my Canon, trying to coach them into group play. Not sure if I accomplished my goal or merely destroyed my content and melted this machine. I may have to bug out to a simpler era, Fred Astaire at Stanford Theatre and popcorn at throwback prices, which is not the same as pelting the screen with Milk Duds, which I swore of years ago. So, here, in prep for this essay, mostly written, on donuts, is a view of Anish Kapoor “Cloud Gate” which some people call the Bean.
2.
Not sure how to react to the news that the Defense Logistics Agency’s subsistence shop is in the market for doughnuts – lots of doughnuts – for the Navy. Never thought a chocolate-frosted, cream-filled confection could properly be labeled a “subsistence” item like it is on the contract solicitation. (This is actually Mark, another Mark, Thompson, in Time Magazine, Jan. 2013, he is a defense writer or DC correspondent, meaning our Capital and not the comic book company. I should probably glaze this doughy mess, I mean italicize the lift, this is plagiarism in the traditional sense, or back in the day when indeed you would want to trade dollars for donuts, or say that.)
Or that the Navy would be buying them, following this recent story in the independent Navy Times newspaper about tubby shipmates: “Almost 13,000 sailors could be just a jelly doughnut away from getting kicked out of the Navy.” Fried puffs of rich cake are not a health-food staple.
Fact is, the Navy wants DLA wants to buy it 678 dozen raspberry-filled donuts, as the government spells it. Not to mention 1,172 dozen glazed, 652 dozen lemon-filled, 686 dozen fudge-glazed, and 746 dozen cream-filled delights. Plus several other varieties, including 516 dozen of the plain version (that’s the smallest quantity being bought, perhaps for all those chiefs trying to pass their fitness tests). Bids are due by 3 p.m. Thursday, Jan. 24, with deliveries slated to begin Feb. 10.
The doughnuts will be delivered by the winning bidder(s) starting Feb. 13 to several Florida locations:
DLA TROOP SUPPORT intends to support the needs of its customers by entering into one (1) Indefinite Delivery Purchase Order (IDPO) per region to supply Fresh Donut Items to the customers stated below. This solicitation contains the estimated donut requirements for customers in Mayport/Jacksonville, Florida: Troop Issue, Naval Station Mayport Oasis Galley, NAS Jacksonville Galley, Florida Air National Guard, Fleet Support (Ships) at Mayport, NOAA Ships, USCG Visiting Cutters, USCG Sector Jacksonville, Florida.
“Fresh Donut Items”?
“Estimated donut requirements”? (This is how the Pentagon is supposed to define “requirements.”)
The contract doesn’t specify who’s actually going to be devouring the donuts. No one’s going to deny them to our in-shape sailors. But could we be footing the bill for civilians’ donuts? We’ve asked the DLA.
“This solicitation is for a one-year Indefinite Delivery Purchase Order (IDPO) for the acquisition of donut items, not to exceed 12 months or $150,000.00, whichever occurs first,” the solicitation says.
Whichever occurs first?
No wonder they’re eating so much – they want to chow down before the money runs out.
Several customers joked or remarked that they wanted to buy “the big donut” which is probably not by Claes Oldenberg but might be by Mohamed Soumah. I also wanted to shout out and here is as good a place as any, to Ricki Frankel and I think “Corry”, Ricki being a Dartmouth contemporary of mine and a life-coach (but not for me), and working at Stanford GSB. Which reminds of of John Willinsky of Ed School and Mayfield the Band playing The Black Keys and Ray Charles with Vanessa Perkiness (auto-speller, I think it is Perkins, but not Cooker Perkins of Michigan State fame), deserves for clarity, whatever that is these days, post-days, I have: Escondido-Lausen Barnum, “White Keys” (sic) Ray Charles medley John Willinsky coming back from sabbatical still time to sign up for his courses (insert photo here). Maybe I am only saying that like a mobius strip a donut goes around and around with no obvious starting point so why be linear here? Why start now? Meanwhile, Jonathan Waldman wrote back to say he, too, laments the demise of HD/PA:
Hey Mark – Nice to hear from you – Yes, of course I remember, it was a very memorable evening. Funny, I recently came across their business card I picked up that night, when I was cleaning out my desk – though I don’t recall if I threw it out or just threw it back in my desk. I still get out that way from time to time – last month I was in Newark, CA at the aloft hotel there, and came upon this shopping center that was full of asian shops, like a strip mall chinatown – nice! /Donuts are making a resurgance in Phila, so if you’re ever in Phila, let me know./Thanks for the sharing the sad news about the demise of Happy Donuts – I’ll pass it along to my partner that evening, who I haven’t spoken with in about 7 years (Dan Goettle, I believe it was)./Jonathan I am trying to shape this essay like something designed by Oldenburg and Kapoor, if that makes sense
3.
4.
from Sue Dremman, Palo Alto Weekly, who broke the story:
Doughnut seekers who approached the Barron Park neighborhood establishment were stunned and saddened by the news on Wednesday after reading the signs on the doors that indicated the last cruller or jelly doughnut will be served at 10 p.m.
Owner Soknea Hort said the store lost its contract, but Happy Donuts has a new location at 1062 S. De Anza Blvd., Suite C101 in San Jose. She wants to reopen in Palo Alto and is looking for a space.
Ironically enough, today is National Free Donut Day. The larger chains are giving it away.
5.
Play your cards right, and you can snag no fewer than six free donuts on Friday, June 6. (but not at Happy Donuts–Ed)
Not that we’re advising you to do any such artery-clogging, time-consuming thing, of course. But you could, technically. And oh, what an epic, Homer Simpson-esque escapade that would be!
Krispy Kreme {I deleted the link here; why let them steal our thunder}is the best-known national brand handing out donuts, no strings attached. Guests take their pick of any variety totally for free, no purchase necessary. If you seek only one free handout on National Doughnut Day—the preferred spelling at KK is Doughnut, not Donut—Krispy Kreme is probably the easiest, most convenient, and most rewarding option. (And what’s the deal with indulging in only one free donut? You’re making the rest of us gluttons look bad!)
edit to add, or Part 6 — and from here on out it is me doing the heavy lifting, time to make the donuts, or my sinker is no stinker: at least I met Barry Hayes, a fellow Dartmouth, reading Eric Schlosser and training his service dog — I stopped him because he had, I noticed one table away, taken a snapshot of the famous doughnut fixture here. He agreed, because my Very Stupid Cell Phone is malfunctioning, to zap me his jpeg “no worries”. He noticed my cap and tipped his hand, so to speak — we abstained from the secret handshake. He said he had a lead on a poem written about this specific donut-hole-in-the-wall so maybe he’ll get back to me and I will eat-it-to-add. Incidentally, but it kinda made my morning — with 3 minutes to spare — Barry said that he recalls attending the Negativland show I produced at Cubberley, for Earthwise Productions, in 1998.
I posted an update on Sue’s story, live from the scene:
Posted by Mark Weiss, a resident of Barron Park
0 minutes ago
It’s a party here, for only another 10 hours — close at 10 p.m. forever, as Sue states sadly.
Mark Weiss, reporting on site, savoring a chocolate covered old fashioned and using the wi-fi.
Web Link
Maybe David Packard will take pity on us and show that old Shirley Temple movie with her making the donuts.
Dora’s Dunking Donuts from 1933
and to Barry again:
From: mark weiss <earwopa@yahoo.com>
To: Barry Hayes <bhayesXXXXXXX>
Sent: Friday, June 6, 2014 12:21 PM
Subject: Re: Ur donut
edit to add: apparently the whole farrago was a fake “going out of business sale”. D’Oh!
I posted thusly:
Posted by Mark Weiss, a resident of Another Palo Alto neighborhood
0 minutes ago
Whether it was willful or due to journalistic ineptitude, the Weekly’s coverage of Happy Donuts closing is…wait for it…an unethical subsidy for the landlord…
See also:
Notice Regarding Bankruptcy: Debtor’s Store Closing or Going-Out-of-Business Sales 11 USC § 101 et seq. – To give notice to the California Attorney General of a motion or other bankruptcy proceeding that seeks authority for a debtor’s store closing or going-out-of-business sales, present service to:
Consumer Law Section, Attn: Bankruptcy Notices
California Attorney General’s Office
455 Golden Gate Avenue, Suite 11000
San Francisco, CA 94102-7004
Molly Stump should look into this and take appropriate action. (Beyond ordering a box of jelly filled to go…)
Also, why don’t you report on the name of the building owner? Apparently the residents circulated this info…
Bad reporter, no donut!!!!
The owners of this property must be in a coffee klatch with the people who run Alma Plaza…
The Maguffin here was the number of people who asked, at the fake closing, what would happen to the giant donut fixture and were told that it would stay with the property….D’oh!!










